Koryo Tours Exclusive News!
On the first anniversary of the DPRK’s unexpected nationwide ban on selfie-sticks (also first announced by Koryo Tours) comes a fascinating new piece of news. The United Kingdom, fresh from initiating the first stages of invoking Article 50, has announced its first confirmed post-Brexit trade deal, and it is with none other than the DPRK! Trade barriers on essential food goods such as Kimchi, Yorkshire Puddings, Ginseng, and Welsh Cakes will be dropped entirely, and the exchange of experts in the bilateral-cultural-relationship-building fields of rugby (from the UK), and knee-wrestling (from North Korea), will take place as a precursor to expected future joint-missions to explore joint ventures such as wind-farming, Mass Dancing, and production of Reality TV.
Foreign Office spokesperson Mr. Nigel Emanekaf said “in the wake of Brexit the British government has looked around for new trading blocs to join, to increase our presence in far-off markets and impress the word with Britain’s soft power as well as our delicious curries and baked goods. We’re proud to sign this first post-Brexit agreement with the DPRK and look forward to a Marks & Spencer opening in Pyongyang next year at the same time as a branch of Kwangbok Supermarket opens on Oxford Street”
KCNA, the official news organ of the DPRK, reported the new development in unusually positive terms; “Britain, a once-mighty and now faded imperialist power today announced its total and unequivocal surrender to the forces of Juche Socialism, signing surrender agreements and accepting the absorbtion of its economy into that of the DPRK's. Finally the working people of the UK will break their chains and join the liberated masses of the world in the sunshine of collective labour”
In a surprising gesture of friendship to their new trading partner, the Pyongyang City Government announced that from today, April 1st, the May Day Stadium will be renamed the 'Theresa May Day Stadium'